"She Is In Critical, Critical Condition"

I woke up early Monday morning to meet my daughter for coffee and pick up my granddaughter for the day.  I didn't bother to take a shower or anything because I was just going to come back home.   While I was waiting, the senior living facility where my mom lives called me.  You know it probably isn't good news when they call you at 7:30 in the morning.

The conversation started with, "Deana, we found your mom unconscious in the shower this morning. Her body was covering the drain and she was face down in the water."  Then I heard, "Hello, this is EMS.  We are with your mother and we have a good team of people working on her.  Do we have your permission to put in a ventilator?  She is in critical, critical condition."  

I told them, "Of course they could."  By this time I was starting to shake because I couldn't believe mom was drowning in a shower.  EMS asked me what hospital she preferred.  I told them and they said, "Oh no mam, she has to go to a trauma center."

I called Bill because I couldn't think straight at this point.  I needed to wait for my granddaughter but I wondered if I only had a few minutes to see my mom alive.  I told myself to take a few minutes to calm down.  I kept thinking, "Mom will be so upset with me if I have an accident on the way over."

When I arrived at the ER I was greeted with, "We don't know how long she was without oxygen."  All kinds of scenarios were playing in my head.  I was thinking through her directives in my mind.  Do I really remember all of her wishes depending on different scenarios?  I could need to give a  decision at any moment.  I thought I knew her wishes but I contacted my friends to see if they could go in my house and e-mail me a copy of her directives.  There were so many decisions to be made.  The nurses had all kinds of questions for me to answer.  I kept trying to push away the memories of other traumas we had experienced at this hospital in the past.

I was so thankful to have Bill by my side taking phone calls, answering texts, and listening to reports.  Soon my oldest brother and my sister-in-law arrived.  I was so thankful to have them and their input.  One of their dear friends, a nurse, was there as well.  She was invaluable in helping me understand what was going on.

Four days ago I was looking at my mom who was unresponsive, on a ventilator, with signs of a possible hear attack, water in her lungs, an infection, and blood pouring out her ear.  Now she is out of ICU and only has a few bruises and a ruptured eardrum!  Unbelievable!

Today I questioned if I made it worse than it really was. I was recently told by one of the first responders, however, they thought Mom had died.  The police were on the scene and so was the coroner.  

So, why do I share this on a special needs blog?  I think it is relatable for a number of reasons.  I have learned invaluable lessons from the last four days.

• Never take your loved ones for granted!  They can be gone in a five minute phone call.
• Many of us keep the suffering some families affected by disabilities endure at arm's length.  If it is too close to us, we have to walk through the suffering with them and we have to acknowledge that at any moment, it could be a challenge in our lives.  Embrace them.  Love them.
• We can't be afraid of discussing and putting our affairs (and those of our parent's) in order.  It is hard to talk about, but once we have them in order, we can all take a sigh of relief.  
• Never take any day for granted.  We don't know how many we have.
• When things get tough, hold on to Jesus even tighter!

I am so grateful for the staff at Highland Estates.  They saved my mother's life.  I am thankful for the drops of water leaking from my mom's floor through the ceiling below.  She would have died if no one had reported them.  I am thankful for EMS and the great lengths and sacrifices they make to save someone's life.  I am thankful for Momma and that I can still see her... listen to her...be with her.  Most of all, I am thankful for God who remains by my side no matter how hard the trial is ahead of me.