Grace Without Margins: Chapter Seventeen

Unexpected Tools

This is probably one of my favorite chapters because I love to talk about the incredible things God does.  In the book I share about a friend of ours that has a disability but looks for ways for God to be glorified through it.  I won't spoil the story if you haven't read the book but I do have some questions to consider...

• What do you think is your greatest weakness?
• Have you ever seen God use your weakness to do something amazing?
• If not, do you think God could ever use it in a powerful way?
• Do you believe that God can use your strengths and your weaknesses equally?
• What are some of the tools you have available to you in ministry?  Think of some ways you can help a child feel acceptance, feel loved, feel connected, and feel valuable in the church.

 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:10 (NIV)

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Sixteen

Advocate Vs. Influence

Can you recall a time when God set you up for something amazing?  He prompted you to do something.  You did it only out of obedience and then you watched God's plans unfold.

What is the hardest part for you in trusting God's promptings?  Do you second guess if you heard Him right?  Is it hard to take the next step?  Is it hard to not be the one in control?

What images and situations come to mind when you think about the word "advocate?"  When have you seen advocacy used effectively?  When have you seen it do more harm than good?

What images and situations come to mind when you think about the word "influence?"  When have you seen influence used effectively?  When has it not been effective?

In your current ministry, in what areas do you need to advocate and in what areas do you need to influence?  Who is the best advocate on your ministry team?  Who is the best influencer?  What do you need to learn from each other?

I found a quote yesterday that I love.  

What I like in a good author is not what he says, but what he whispers. 

~Logan Pearsall Smith, 

"All Trivia," Afterthoughts, 1931

I remember one Sunday I heard a children's ministry volunteer talking to another volunteer about the "normal" children.    I leaned over and whispered, "Have you thought about what that word communicates about the other kids?"  That is all I needed to whisper.  This particular volunteer is an amazing lady and I share it with humility because I had someone whisper in my ear years ago.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Fifteen

Recognizing Similarities

As people we tend to think we are alone in our trials and sufferings.  Sometimes we think we have it harder than anyone else.  The truth is, we all suffer.  Everyone of us will go through something difficult that we don't think we will ever be able to survive.  I have met very few people that have not experienced deep sorrow and disappointment, and, if I think they haven't, they probably haven't shared the deep wounds of their heart, or they haven't had their turn yet.

• Think of a time with the unexpected happened.  How did your react?  I love Andy Andrews book, The Noticer Returns.  In the book a young man is pushed into a very cold pool and the wise man that pushed the young man in says, "Every single day for the rest of your life, somebody is going to push you in the pool.  And you’d better decide now how you’re going to act when it happens.”
• Think about a time when your life changed course?
• What are some of the challenges you think a family affected by disability experiences?
• How about reaching out to a family in your church and asking them about their journey.  You will be amazed and you will be blessed to hear their story.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Fourteen

Let's Be Honest

Christ did not choose whom to love.  He simply loved.  

7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

1 John 4:7-8 (NIV)

• Who is hard for you to love?
• Where are your blind spots?
• What type of person do you make assumptions about?
• In what relationships do you need to grow and change?
• How can your ministry partners hold you accountable?

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Thirteen

Sharing the Gospel

Sometimes we loose sight of what matters the most in ministry.  We can become so focused on the logistics of ministry that we forget the ultimate purpose and that is to introduce people to the love, grace and salvation of Christ's ultimate sacrifice.

• Do you have someone on your ministry team that is passionate about sharing the gospel to a variety of children with a variety of backgrounds and abilities?
• Do you properly value this aspect of the ministry?
• Are you providing him/her the resources needed?  
• Do you provide training and growth opportunities?
• Do you have a team of people committed to praying for evangelism opportunities?

It can be tempting to doubt you are making a difference in the lives of children that are non-verbal.  You may never know the outcome of your efforts until you get to heaven.  That is ok!  Trust God, trust the Holy Spirit, pray and be full of joy and anticipation.  One of the most amazing things about God is, you never know what He is up to.  We can trust, however, that He is always working in the hearts of the people we minister to as well as ourselves.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Twelve

Wookie Wookie

It has been a blessing to me over the years to find a special greeting for the kids that it takes a little more time to build a relationship with.  Think of a greeting that compliments the child.  For example, I worked with one little girl that could not communicate orally and rarely showed expression on her face.  It was important to be consistent and to greet her the same way the moment I saw her.  With her, I always signed "beautiful girl."  I can't say she ever smiled when I greeted her but she always looked for my sign and then would come towards me and hug me.  She will always be my "beautiful girl."

Turn towards your ministry partner, hold up your hands, make them "talk" and say, "Wookie Wookie."  Do this over and over.  It was kind of fun, wasn't it!

Here are some ideas on developing a special greeting:

• Give them a "sign name."
• Give a "high five."
• Give a "fist bump."
• Give them a compliment. 
• Greet them with the same phrase.

In your discussion group, share ways you have done this.  What greeting have you continually used without realizing it?

Give an example of a time when you entered someone else's world.  What was the outcome?

Share about a child you are wanting to reach.  Let the group give you some ideas on how to greet them or enter their world.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Eleven

Listening With Your Heart

"The ability to listen with your heart can come naturally, but it can also develop over time.  I think this is one of the many reasons God asks us to serve one another.  It gives us time, in the presence of another, to learn when they need and what they are going to be able to impart to us.  Listen with your heart."

Relationships are not easy.  Even the ones we think are easy have their difficult moments.  I wish I had heard the phrase "listen with your heart" many years ago.  There are so many relationships and moments within those relationships when I wish I had stopped, taken a step back and listened with my heart.  If I had set aside my own desires...if I had listened to the wisdom of someone else...if I had just comforted instead of tried to "fix" something...if I had listened for the real concern rather than the one I assumed it was... things may have turned out differently.

Listen with your heart when you have a conflict

• with your parents
• with your friends
• with your boss 
• with your spouse
• with your children
• with the child in your Sunday School class
• with the family walking through the doors of your church
• and especially, with God

My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. John 10:27

Special Needs Training Opportunity

Whether you are a church blessed with a few people or a number of people affected by special needs or a parent or volunteer looking for support in starting a special needs ministry, we would love to have you join us for our training sessions.

Special Needs Ministry Training Part I:  Austin, Texas
Hill Country Bible Church Lakeline Campus Bldg A Room 2.120
Saturday, January 10, 2014

8:30 am - 2:00 p.m.

"How to Start a Special Needs Ministry":  Attend a one-hour training that will help you think outside the box on what this ministry can look like.  We will discuss vision and purpose as well as discuss ideas on how to get your church leadership and congregation on board, changing a culture and recruiting, training and motivating volunteers.  We will also discuss some of the obstacles and blessings you will encounter in this ministry.

B.U.D.D.Y. I:  Join us for a three-hour B.U.D.D.Y. training.  This training focuses on the nuts and bolts of working with a variety of disabilities and age groups.  During this portion of the training we will discuss behavior modification strategies, handling seizures, general safety and security issues, as well as many other topics.

The cost is $25 per person and will include snacks and lunch. Please RSVP or contact us, Bill and Deana Boggess, at theboggi@aim.com.  You can also reach us at 512-673-0187.  We look forward to hearing from you!

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Ten

Shun, Enable or Empower

Have you ever thought about what these words mean?  Our perspective on these three words will affect how we interact with people in our ministries and our personal lives.

• Have you ever been shunned?  Have you ever shunned someone else?  How did it make you feel?
• Have you ever been enabled?  Have you ever enabled someone else?  How did it make you feel?
• Have you ever been empowered?  Have you ever helped empower someone else?  How did it make you feel?
• How do you feel about comforting, stabilizing and then empowering families affected by disabilities?  What would it mean for your church to do this?  What changes would you need to make?

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Nine

Fear Vs. Pity

Here are some interesting questions to discuss for chapter nine...

• Have you ever been afraid of someone with a disability?  Why did they scare you?  What changed?
• Have you ever been grown close enough to someone that you no longer saw their disability?
• Have you ever experienced a time when your greatest strength became your greatest weakness?  Explain.
• Have you ever experienced a time when your greatest weakness became your greatest strength?  Explain.
• Have you ever pitied someone?  Why?
• Has anyone ever pitied you?  How did it make you feel?
• Have you ever disabled someone with your mercy?

Save The Date...

Save the Date!

Our next special needs ministry training will be held on January 10th in Cedar Park at 

Hill Country Bible Church. 

More details will follow soon but I wanted to at least get the date to you!

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Eight

Fairness

"Fairness is not about giving people the same thing, it is about giving people what they need."

"How Difficult Can This Be?" Richard Lavoie

• Do you expect all of the children in your ministry to worship the same way?
• Does it make you uncomfortable if they worship differently than the rest of the kids?  Why?
• Whose weakness needs to be looked at?  The person with special needs or yours?
• Who are you missing out on because they are different from you?
• What have you let a five-year-old teach you lately?

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Seven

Serving Volunteers

"No matter how incredible our recruiting efforts were, they needed to be ongoing.  My experience is that recruiting is not an issue that can be solved or eradicated.  You merely become more efficient at it."

• What are your ideas on recruiting volunteers?  Where will you find them?  What direction or course will you set for them?
• How are you casting vision for your volunteers?
• Have you celebrated lately?  What things do you have to celebrate in your ministry?
• What are the most important things you need to do for your volunteers?
• Are you praying for your volunteers on a regular basis?

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Six

Partnering With Leaders

Sometimes it may take a while to get the leadership of the church on board for a new ministry.  That is ok.  God is working even when you are waiting.  

Discussion questions for Chapter Six:

• Is your leadership on board for special needs ministry?
• Have you shared your passion with them?
• Have you introduced them to the people in your congregation you are hoping to serve?
• Have you been gracious?  
• Have you been thankful?
• In what ways do you need to be patient?

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Five

The Call of the Church

In chapter five of Grace Without Margins, I talk about the call of the church.  Below are some discussion questions:

• How have you been received by the church?  
• What do you think Christ expected his church to be? Take some time to search Scripture and learn about Christ's perspective on the church.
• Have you ever had someone visit your church that made you uncomfortable?  Be honest about the experience and share it with a ministry friend.  How did you react?  How could you have extended grace?  What have you learned from the experience?
• As a church who are we called to serve?  What are the next steps your church needs to take in reducing those in the margins?  What do you feel called to do personally?

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Four

Setting the Paradigm

     Well, here come some tough questions as we take inventory and evaluate the margins that our churches may be characterized by. 

• Has your church every turned away a child or a family because it was too hard to serve them?  Was there a valid reason?  How could the situation have been handled differently?
• Do you agree or disagree that the church is called to serve whomever walks through its doors?  Give specific reasons for your answers.
• Would you consider throwing a banquet for the people outside your church doors?  What would it look like?
• Do you believe that everyone is created in the image of God?  What type of person changes that belief?  Why?

These are tough questions, but they are important to answer.  I encourage you to not be afraid of the questions, rather be open to the possibilities.  

Note:  Grace Without Margins is now available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Kindle, and Ingram Distributors.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Three

Strength In Weakness

     Over the next couple of months I will continue to post discussion questions for the book, Grace Without Margins.  

     In Ephesians 3:20 it says, "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us."  

• Have you ever experienced a time in your life when you felt too "weak" to do something but because of God, you were strong?
• Describe an experience when God did more than you could ask or imagine.  
• How did it impact your faith?  
• How did it change your ministry?
• What weakness do you have that it would "blow you away" if God used it to accomplish His plan?
• Describe a challenge you had that blessed you.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Two

The Calling

     I have been reading an interesting book, the speed of dark by Elizabeth Moon.  It is written from the perspective of a young man affected by autism.  I am trying to become like him as I read it...thinking like he thinks...feeling what he feels.  He definitely seems to be in the margins of society.
     In chapter two of, Grace Without Margins, I talk about those marginalized by society.  Dictionary.com has one of the harshest definitions of "margin." It is "a limit in condition, capacity, etc., beyond or below which something ceases to exist, be desirable, or be possible."  When you think of that definition in terms of people, that is really concerning.
     When I think of the marginalized, I think of people that are not in the spotlight, they are overlooked, they are left out and not valued as much as those in the mainstream of society.  Here are some questions to think about and discuss:

• What does it mean for a group of people to be marginalized?
• Have you ever been in the margins?  How did you feel?
• Do you feel God is calling you to serve a specific group of people? How are they in the margins?

Grace Without Margins: Chapter One

Setting the Stage

The stage is set by the experiences of our past.  Our perspectives and opinions are shaped by
them.  This week share with a friend or ministry worker about your upbringing and the
experiences that had an impact on your future.

• Have you ever felt like a minority?  Describe the experience.
• Has racial inequality been a struggle in your lifetime?
• Who was the rock in your family while you were growing up?
• What did your mom and dad's life show you?
• Describe the types of people that frequented your home as you were growing up.  Who frequents your home now?
• Do you count the cost of doing what is right?  Explain.
• Talk about a time when you had to trust God.

Grace Without Margins: The Introduction

     One of my favorite verses in the Bible is,

"Where there is no vision, the people perish." Proverbs 29:18 (NIV)

I love that God continually gives me vision.  It would be incredibly challenging to me if I were to ever find myself without one.  I feel fully alive when I can see God's vision before me.  It helps me get up in the morning and feel wonderfully exhausted when I go to bed at night.  Has God given you a vision for your life?  Have you looked for it?

     These are only two of the questions I have for the Introduction to my book, Grace Without Margins.  Below are more questions to think about and discuss with a friend or partner in ministry.

• Have you ever listened to the I Have A Dream speech by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.?  What statement did Dr. King make that stood out to you the most?
• What legacy has been handed down to you?
• What are the hopes you have for your children?
• How have your children challenged you to grow?
• Who have been your "spotters" in your journey?
• Where has Jesus taken you that made you hold His hand tightly?

A Virtual Small Group

     It was 6:30 am on a Saturday morning and yep, God woke me up early.  I was so looking forward to sleeping in but God had other plans and I must say, I am glad.  Earlier this week a friend of a friend asked if I would put together discussion questions for my book, Grace Without Margins.  My sweet Lord prompted me to get up and get started.

     I love all of my friends on Facebook, that is why you are on there.  If I could I would have you all over for coffee and listen to you share about your lives...that would be great fun!  Not all of us like to sit around with a cup of coffee talking about our pasts and dreaming about the future, however.  I would never want to overwhelm you with post after post on Facebook.  So....

     For the next 24 weeks I am going to share, I hope, thought provoking questions with you.  Maybe God will lead you to discuss them with a friend or they can be ice-breaker questions at your next children's ministry meeting or congregational care gathering.  I will not put them on Facebook but you can receive notifications of posts by becoming a member of my blog.  I don't want to overwhelm my friends on Facebook that are not interested. You can sign up to receive notifications of posts on my homepage.

     Thank you for visiting with me.  If you have insights or past experiences that would encourage the rest of us, I would love for you to share them with us in the comments section.  I suppose we could have a virtual small group of sorts.  In no way am I an expert, merely a facilitator that loves to encourage dialog.

     I hope you have a great week and I will see you starting Monday, October 27th.  Be sure to sign up if you want to be a member :)

Ministry Growing Pains

     When Bill and I first started the special needs ministry at our church the people we served were very young.  They were pre-school age or not even born yet.  Even though we were very inexperienced, it was relatively easy because the children were so young.

     Now the children are in their teens and young twenties and that has greatly changed the dynamics of the ministry.  There are different needs physically, socially, emotionally and spiritually when 16 years have passed.  The growing pains can be incredibly difficult but they can also be very exciting.  When ministry is going smoothly we tend to take the ministry for granted.  We turn to God less and so often hold onto the ministry too tightly and don't seek the Lord's direction.  When you are in the midst of growing pains, however, you have to turn your focus back on God and look for His guidance.  Then God came reveal His plans for the future.

     Many years ago my father said, "You will know your ministry is successful when you can no longer see it.  It should be in the very fabric of your church."  Unfortunately I didn't have enough time left with my dad to fully understand what that would mean.  Bill and I have had to learn on our own and I am still wrestling with that question.  Dad talked about the physical aspects of our building and how the facility was in compliance with disability accessibility, but the harder part would be in relationships.  How do you help the church grow in such a way that a person with a disability can walk through the doors of the church and feel welcomed and assimilated into the church family no matter what avenue they used to come in?  In other words, they need to feel comfortable in the church as a whole, not just in the special needs ministry.  

     How do we help the wheelchairs, glasses, hearing aids, and other aids disappear so we can see the person?  Then later add them back in as just another dimension of that person?  How do we help the totality of a church body not be afraid, but simply embrace the people God brings to them?

     I still don't have the answers, but I keep mulling something over.  When we started the ministry we named it and gave it an identity.  It was put under children's ministry because we were serving children.  I wonder if the the best thing to do now would be to start at the top and work our way down.  We have a valuable asset in our church and that is the elderly.  They often have physical challenges.  They are experiencing a great deal of transition and may feel they don't have a place in the church anymore.  What if we invest some time in gleaning from their wisdom?  Ask questions about how they feel connected or disconnected in the church.  Make sure they understand their value and help them find a place to serve if they aren't already.  They may need some accommodations to be able to serve, but we can learn so much from them.  If we get in the habit of making sure our family members feel welcome, nurtured and assimilated into the church family, the very fabric of our church can change and grow.  Do we believe that everyone is created in God's image?  Do we believe that everyone has been given gifts and can serve in the church?  If the answer to those questions is yes, then find a way for everyone to serve and grow and feel welcome.  You may have to make some mistakes, but the investment will be worth it.  

     The music world would be different without the talent of Stevie Wonder.  Our history would have been different without the inspiration of Helen Keller.  Your church will be different without the young lady with Down Syndrome that is impacting your church...one hug at a time.

     God always has an amazing plan.  I cannot wait to see what God is going to do next.  In the meantime, I will look for His footprints in ministry and in the lives of the people He brings through the church doors.  

Grace Without Margins

     When I look back over my life it is fascinating to see the things God did to prepare me for the experiences that would happen in the future.  I never would have predicted those experiences but when I need a little wisdom or insight into a situation, if I sit back and think about it, I will be able to recall numerous experiences that will show me how God prepared me.  One of the greatest blessings of my life has been serving a community of people affected by special needs, yet God taught me so many things before I even got there.
     When my father passed away twelve years ago, I promised God I would do whatever He asked of me.  Then the words and stories of this book came to me and I would get up in the middle of the night and write them down.  My commitment to doing whatever God asked of me wasn't so much in writing the book, but in publishing it.  It is quite scary to put your heart on paper and then let the whole world read it.
     A journey through special needs, civil rights, and above all, grace. "My hope is that, through sharing my heart with you, you will be moved. Maybe there is a child that will come through the door of your church this week and you will look at them differently. Hopefully, you will not look at them with the fears of starting a new ministry, but with a heart of compassion that simply wants to embrace them and all that God has made them to be. I promise you the journey will be amazing and you will be both changed and blessed!"
     Even if we do not have a church title by our name, we all have a ministry.  It is a ministry that we serve in every day with every person that comes across our path.

Every day of your life is an opportunity to be a blessing to someone.  Author Unknown

http://www.amazon.com/Grace-Without-Margins-Deana-Boggess-ebook/dp/B00O384IOO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1413339700&sr=8-1&keywords=grace+without+margins

Embrace The Challenge!

     The other day I wrote about a word that I don't like:  confinement.  Today I wanted to talk about a word that I do like:  embrace.  Embrace, according to Dictionary.com, means the following:

1.  to take or clasp in the arms; press to the bosom; hug.

2.  to take or receive gladly or eagerly; accept willingly:

     to embrace an idea.

3.  to avail oneself of:

     to embrace an opportunity.

4.  to adopt (a profession, a religion, etc.)

5.  to take in with the eye or the mind.

6.  to encircle; surround; enclose.

7.  to include or contain

     I think it is interesting our society embraces glasses.  They represent a challenge for us.  They show that we are less than perfect but as a society we tend to think of them as a fashion statement.  A couple of years ago I had to get glasses, progressive lenses no less, and I bought glasses with leopard print on them.  That isn't exactly inconspicuous!

     Since my husband is an audiologist I asked him why hearing aids are not thought of the same way.  He chuckled and said there was a time a few years ago that manufacturers were trying to make them a fashion statement by adding jewelry.  I said, "It was a flop, wasn't it?"  Once again, he laughed.

     Over the years I have met many people that refuse to wear hearing aids because they don't want anyone to see them or think less of them.  I guess I want to say, take it and clasp it in your arms,

embrace the opportunity, receive it gladly, adopt and adapt, encircle it, and include it in your life.  

     I remember so many dinner conversations with my dad checked out because he couldn't hear anyone very well.  He was left out.  I have numerous other friends that have done the same thing.

     A few years ago I wore a hearing aid so I could understand one of my students.  I didn't wear them for a few years after that and now, well, I think they may be a permanent part of my getting ready in the morning.  I realized that I was missing out.  I was frustrating some loved ones when they had to constantly repeat things for me.  On top of it you can only act like you understood a conversation and give inappropriate responses so long before you look like you have other challenges as well.

     I am still getting used to some of the sounds I never heard like rustling paper and water dripping.  I am also discovering that not near as many people have speech impediments as I once thought :) but I feel more included, especially in crowds and at restaurants.

     I just want to encourage you to get your hearing checked if you are feeling more left out of conversations.  Your family wants you fully present and able to add to conversation.  Life is going to throw all kinds of challenges at us.  We can't always dodge them.  Sometimes we just have to embrace them.  So even if you have to add a little "bling," make a fashion statement if needed!

The Blessing of Down Syndrome

My heart is coming out on paper soon in a book called, Grace Without Margins.  In the book I refer to a young man as having the blessing of Down Syndrome.  Before I sent it back to the publisher for printing I asked a friend of mine, who has a daughter with Down Syndrome, if anyone would be bothered by my use of the word, "blessing."  I asked if people would understand.  She said it was fine and in fact, she had said it in her post earlier that day.

The friends of mine with Down Syndrome are amazing people.  One of them is a great swimmer, one is the friendliest and hardest working employee at HEB, and one is a virtual friend who is changing the world, one hug at a time!

I have attached a video that beautifully displays the "True Colors" of a person and the love we need to extend to one another.  The blessing of Down Syndrome is the ability to love, to hug, to come to God as a child, and the ability to show one's true colors with openness and honesty.

Cyndi Lauper - True Colors (MattyBRaps Cover ft Olivia Kay)


Blessings-
Deana

Take Off the Turtleneck

I guess we all have our issues and one of mine is confinement.  I never liked turtlenecks because they confined my neck.  I have never liked closed-toed shoes, because well, they confined my toes.  I love to hug, but I also have a somewhat larger space bubble.  I don't like small rooms, small cars, or small clothes....there you go.

Most of all, however, I don't like boxes or at least not being confined to one.  I have never liked boxes.  I don’t like to teach in a box and I definitely don’t like to put children in a box.  They don’t need labels from me such as class clown or brain or the colorful one.  I should never limit a child’s potential by a box I picked for them.

As an adult I don't like to be called a republican.  I don't like to be called a democrat.  I don't like to be called conservative or liberal because I am either one or both depending on who is confining me.

My point is, we shouldn't feel the necessity to confine people with a box or a label.  We are all wonderfully complex with the ability to learn and grow and even change.  I have several friends with recent diagnoses.  I would hate for them to be put in a box with a diagnosis label because you know what, they are still everything they were before.  They have just added another dimension.

This week remember to embrace the totality of a person.  Describe them by their gifts, their talents and their impact.  Let them be free to be all that God designed them to be.

Twinkle Wrinkles

     Through the years I have met numerous people affected by a variety of challenges.  Some challenges were physical, some were intellectual and some were emotional.  Sometimes the people were frustrated and sometimes they used their challenges to make a great difference in the world.   The challenge that has been on my mind in the last several years is one that most of us will face and that is the challenge that aging proposes.

     I don't know which is harder to look at an elderly person and imagine them young or to look at a young person and imagine them old.  It is hard to believe that both ends of the spectrum will exist in a person's lifetime.  

     I have an app on my phone that can age a portrait by 30 years.  It is rather frightening, yet inevitable.  We will either have a short life or we will age.  Even though we seem to be doing everything we can think of to ward off the aging process, it will still happen.

     I met my mother-in-law 30 years ago.  I was 22 and she was 50 (about my age now).  When I met her she had a lot of heartache, a lot of joy, and a lot of wisdom.  Wrinkles were starting to emerge and they all had a story to tell.  I remember asking her advice on marriage and parenting and until she could no longer laugh, we were laughing and trying not to take those very things too seriously but enjoy them.  I remember her saying, "I could handle any stage my children went through as long as they didn't get stuck in one." 

     Over the last ten years I have watched my mother-in-law go back in time resembling a teenager, a youth and now a child.  The process has been hard for her and for us.  We have had to say numerous goodbyes along the way.  The beauty of aging, however, is knowing you have weathered the storms and have left some flavor of a legacy as you rode them out.

     I am now the age she was and I have to ask myself, What am I going to do with the next 30 years? Who knows, I may not even have them but if I do, I need to live them well.  Any challenge we face in life has the ability to disable us or empower us.  If we have a plan, however, we can have a little more control over what that will look like.

     For me, I have decided that over the next 30 years...

• I will never retire.  I will only change what I am doing periodically.
• I will always invest in someone younger than myself and listen to someone older and wiser than myself.
• I will try to complete my "bucket list."
• I will laugh until my sides hurt along the way.
• I will leave things as simple as possible for my children.
• I will leave my heart on paper for my grandchildren.
• I will complete the assignments God has given me and wait enthusiastically for more.
• I will learn as much about God as I can before I meet Him.
• I will extend grace as it has so generously been extended to me.
• and most of all, I will try to keep twinkles in my wrinkles!

Word of the Day: Legacy

     On my 50th birthday a good friend of mine had her daughter, who was one of my students at the time, give me 50 words for my birthday. Some of the words she gave to describe me were "Twinkles," "The Best Teacher I've Ever Had" (the bar is low when you are only 5) and "Puts Her Faith in God."  One of my absolute favorites is, "Loves Us Very, Very Much."  It makes me so happy when I know that my students know that I love them very, very much.

     When my friend gave me the gift she said, "I know how you love words."  I truly had never thought about it but I do love words.  I have a book full of quotes I have collected over the years.  I have quotes all over my craft room and I love fabric simply made up of words.

     My favorite word right now is LEGACY.  I was thrilled when I realized the sermon was going to be on "legacy" this morning.  From Webster's Dictionary:  "Legacy:  anything handed down from the past, as from an ancestor or predecessor." It has been exciting to watch the legacy of my family unfold.  My parents, my siblings, and my children have all served different populations marginalized by society.  As my dad always said, "We have been blessed to be a blessing."

     Sometimes I think we put too much pressure on ourselves regarding our legacy.  If we extend grace to someone and they learn to extend it to someone else, we have left a legacy.  If we demonstrate compassion to someone with a disability and give them a platform to share their gifts, we have left a legacy.  Best of all, if we share Christ with someone and they in turn do the same, we have left a powerful legacy.

     When you wake up in the morning, think about the legacy you want to leave for today.  What do you want to hand down that will make a difference today?

Remember those who led you,

who spoke the word of God to you;

and considering the result 

of their conduct,

imitate their faith.

Hebrews 13:7

         

A Picture of Hope

     This picture evokes all sorts of emotions for me.  It makes me happy.  It makes me sad.  It makes me feel helpless and it gives me hope.

     It makes me happy because here are two people affected by disabilities loving each other in the best way they can.  Barbara can no longer hold a conversation but she can laugh and she can affectionately touch her son.  Bill can't fix everything for his mom but just by his presence and the touch of his hand she can feel secure and cared for.

     It makes me sad because this is a picture of two people that I love very much.  Barbara is facing intellectual challenges and Bill is facing physical ones and there is nothing I can do about it.  That makes me sad.

     I consequently feel helpless.  Dementia has stolen so much from Barbara...her memories, her dreams, and her independence.  No matter how hard I try, I cannot give those back to her.  As for Bill, it breaks my heart that the man I love has to struggle with tasks that we all take for granted. He will have to relearn so many skills.

     Yet overall, this picture gives me hope.  A few minutes before this picture was taken Barbara was upset and afraid and as soon as Bill came up to her, started talking and rubbing her back, she smiled and started swinging her legs.  She felt loved and secure.  Dementia patients may not remember a person or recognize them but they can remember how the person made them feel.  In her world where so many things no longer make sense, she can still feel Bill's love for her and her love for him and that gives me hope.

This Makes Me Smile!

     A good friend of mine posted this video and I have already watched it a multitude of times!  It inspires me.  It encourages me.  It makes every challenge achievable.  And it also makes me smile :)
Enjoy!

Tim's Place Albuquerque: Service With A Smile | You've Got ...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6He0FWoFj0

On A New Journey...

     Since I have lived most of my life in Texas and Colorado I haven't spent much time looking at the ocean, but the times I have were memorable.  I love looking at the ocean.  It is beautiful.  It is calming.  It reminds me of the omnipotence of God.
     As much as I love the ocean and as much as it calms me, I have to acknowledge the power of it.  The tide can change so quickly...much like life can.
     A few weekends ago Bill and I had lengthy to "do lists."  On Saturday morning Bill and I had a little "pow wow" to determine what needed to get done before the weekend was over.  This meant Bill and I needed to separate to "divide and conquer" the list.
     On Saturday we felt good about everything that was accomplished.  On Sunday we went to church with my mom and then out to lunch.  He is always so sweet and wants to make sure everything else is done before he heads out to do what he loves.  Bill loves to woodwork and has for the last 30 years.  Mom and I had some errands to do and Bill was anxious to get to the wood shop to work on some projects.
     Later in the afternoon I received a call from Bill.  He calmly told me that he had cut his pinky off on the table saw and he was at the Emergency Room.  He asked me to bring him a few things and have someone drive me over.
     I was a little surprised by it all.  I was upset that Bill had been hurt and lost a finger but I was relatively calm and gathered some things for him.  When I arrived at the hospital I was surprised to see blood down his clothes and shoes, along with a great deal of tissue from his hand.  I then realized the damage was more extensive than he had told me.
     The surgeon unwrapped his hand.  I sat down because I wasn't sure if I would faint or not.  Then I decided to just move up to his head, hold his hand and kiss his forehead as the surgeon examined him.  It was tempting to look but a good friend that was there with me advised me not to.
     The surgeon said the damage was extensive and he was not sure how much he would be able to repair.  He ended up cleaning the wound and closing it up for a orthopedic hand surgeon to repair the tendons and nerves.
     The first surgery was 3 hours long and then we had to wait another 24 hours for a surgeon to do further surgery.  During that time Bill kept reliving the accident.  He replayed it over and over again.
He was making some final cuts on a project and the board kicked back on him and exploded.  Within those few seconds the blade had gone completely around his hand, cutting almost everything in its path.  He said it didn't hurt but there was blood pouring out of his hand, onto the table, and onto the floor.  He quickly grabbed a rag and wrapped his hand, called 911 and told them what had happened He looked around for his finger because he had heard it fall.  He wasn't sure if there was one or two missing.  He wrapped his finger up and then went outside in case he fainted.  He wanted to be sure the EMT's could find him.
     My reaction to the situation was different.  To be honest my immediate reaction was, "Haven't we been through enough trials lately?"  And soon after, I felt peace and thought, "But God has seen you through every one of them and He will with this too."
     I was flooded with gratefulness for who Bill is.  Bill is a servant hearted man.  Nothing important is left undone.  Bill is always helping one of us.  He has made so many beautiful things in our 30 years together.  When we didn't have money to buy furniture Bill found a way to make it.  He would take old pieces of furniture and remake them for us.  He made beautiful gifts for family members.  He was an experienced craftsman and now in a matter of moments things had changed.
     On the day of surgery the surgeon prepared me for the worst case scenario.  She believed that every tendon and every nerve had been cut, as well as the muscle in his thumb and an artery.  She believed the damage was to bad to repair the tendons and nerves yet.  They would have to put in spacers in the hand and graft tendons from his wrists or the back of his knees at a later date.  She said they would put in tubes for the nerves to grow through.  She said this would take about 6 hours.
     Then she added another concern.  She felt the artery was damaged enough that she would have to repair it and reroute the arteries in his hand.  This would take 12 hours.
     I was incredibly grateful that the blood supply had remained intact, otherwise he would have lost all of his fingers.  So many things could have been so much worse.  He had his life and he had his hand.  The damage was not as extensive as she prepared me for.  He was in surgery for nine hours.
     I wondered how much function Bill would have.  Would he be able to do the things he loves again.  Could we adapt his bike? Would he be able to type again?  How would this affect his job that utilizes his hands so much?
     We are currently in a waiting period.  Bill needs to lay low for a while...don't move his fingers....don't sweat (lol)....don't exert himself.  The surgeon said he will recover with 70% of his strength, will probably be able to tell the difference between hot and cold and anything else will be a blessing.
     So we read Occupational Therapy magazines, articles on the internet, and ask professionals lots of questions.  He has ordered several devices to help him do his job....just differently.  I can think of so many people that have more challenging disabilities and it has helped me appreciate the daily struggles they have to endure to accomplish a task that the rest of us take for granted.  They have also been a source of inspiration, however.  As the saying goes, "When there is a will, there is a way."  Bill has now learned to peel a banana one-handed, dress himself one-handed and write left-handed.
     Even though things are different and still up in the air, we are so incredibly grateful.  We are grateful for every body part we have ever taken for granted.  We are grateful for the numerous people that have helped us with things we didn't even know we would need help with.  We are grateful for God and His presence in our lives.  We hope this experience will ultimately bring glory to Him.

Are You A Dreamer Or A Repeater?

     The first book on my reading list for the summer has been, The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson.   It is a phenomenal book on prayer.  It has already increased my faith just by reading it.

     In the book Batterson suggests that as we age we "stop living out of imagination and start living out of memory."  He says, "We stop creating the future but start repeating the past."  As I have watched people age I have witnessed many people telling the same stories over and over again, both the accomplishments of the past as well as the failures.  Rarely, however, do I see the elderly continuing to dream and imagine what the future could be and what their part in it could be.  This is the key to aging!  We have to continue to dream and imagine!

     For some time I have been thinking about what retirement will look like for me.  I know that I can't crawl under tables doing bear hunts with five-year-olds forever!  I told myself that I would never retire until I have another plan in place.  Well, the other day at a party and in the middle of the night, God told me.  He gave me the next book I am going to write and where I will volunteer.  I now have a dream, even though it is several years away.

     Life may throw challenging situations our way, such as disease or physical limitations, but we can continue to imagine and dream.  God will always have an assignment for us.  We just may have to do it differently than we would have before.

     I know in my later years I don't want to be the person that repeats the same stories from the past over and over again.  I would rather be the dreamer living out what God wants me to do next.

"You're never too old to go after the dreams God has put in your heart."  Mark Batterson

The Later Years

    I sure have missed blogging the last several weeks.  I was busy finishing up the school year and helping a loved one that was in the hospital for three weeks.  Life always seems to be full of new situations, experiences and lessons.

     Bill and I have served in special needs ministry for a lot of years but now we are in a stage of learning about the challenges of the elderly.  Like with children you think you are going to learn a lot from the first child and those lessons will be helpful with the second but in reality, the children are going to be so different that many of the lessons learned won't apply.  It seems to be true with your parents as well.  The later years of each of our parents have all been so different. We have had to learn to navigate them but all in different ways.

     As I am walking this road, my own process of aging becomes apparent.  How do I age gracefully?  How do I continue to make a difference?  How do I prepare to continue to contribute even though I may have to continually change its form?  What adaptations need to be made?  As I have shared with many friends, you can still do the same things,you just may have to do them differently.

     Over the next several weeks I will be sharing about some of the challenges the elderly face.  I look forward to walking this journey with you.

Changing Ourselves, Changing Our World

     The school year is coming to a close.  I am really going to miss my little mentors.  I have learned so much from them this year.
     There are so many wonderful memories from this year but I have to say there is one experience that will stay with me for a long time.  At the beginning of the year we started talking about our strengths and weaknesses.  The kids gradually shared, one-by-one, what their personal struggles are.  We vowed to pray for each other and encourage each other as we went through the year.  One of the kids overcame his fear of performing on stage and did a fabulous job during the graduation program.  Other children overcame their challenge of not being able to ride a two-wheel bike and many of the children shared they wanted to be able to read and now they are!  I feel blessed to be able to watch the kids grow and overcome challenges.  God has really worked through them.
     Joni and Friends highlighted the kids as, "The Little Class That Could."  They could and they did!
Congratulations, Bridge class!  You have helped change the world!

The Response A Challenge Deserves - Part II

     If you are reading this post I hope you have already read Part I.  Since I wrote that post I have been thinking about how to help someone if the midst of your own crisis.  Here is what I have come up with so far...

1.  Just as someone else doesn't know the details of your journey and you wouldn't want someone to make assumptions, don't do that to someone else.  On the surface you may not agree with their reaction to a crisis, but you also don't know the road they have walked.
2.  When you are in the midst of a crisis, think of someone that is going through something harder and pray for them.
3.  Send an encouraging note or e-mail to someone else that is in a crisis.
4.  Pray, pray, pray...even on your knees for a friend...then let them know you did.
5.  Reflect on the hard things you have seen God bring you through and share them with someone
that is needing some hope.
6.  Leave a nice surprise on the doorstep of a friend that needs your support.
7.  Expect a miracle but be open to whatever form it comes in.  You may have a blessing right in front of you.
8.  Journal your journey.  Remember to write the end of the story though and the things you learned.  You can even share some of it on Facebook or in a blog.  You never know who it will help.
9.  Extend grace to the person that is grumpy.  You never know what they are dealing with.
10.  Reach out to a hurting stranger.  Give them a compliment.  Buy their lunch.

     Know that God loves you so much and has a plan for you.  "For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope."
Jeremiah 29:10-12

The Response a Challenge Deserves

     Not very long ago I was looking back over the last ten years or so.  There have been many beautiful blessings in those years, but there have also been some challenging times.  I said goodbye to the last of my grandparents, we grieved the loss of my father-in-law, I said goodbye to my beloved daddy and then we said goodbye to my brother-in-law and brother.  All of their passings were tragic in one way or another and all of them were much to soon.
   I find myself in another interesting time of life.  My home is wonderfully full of people, activity, and new dreams coming to fruition.  At the same time I am closing another school year and saying goodbye to fifteen lovely mentors and their encouraging mommas.  I am saying the longest goodbye you can imagine to my mother-in-law with dementia and watching my own mom face the harsh realities of aging.
     Last night I treated myself to Andy Andrews latest book, The Noticer Returns.  I heard Andrews speak at a "Women of Faith" conference a number of years ago and I have read every one of his books since then.  I love the way he tells a story as well as the way he puts a "zinger" line in once in a while that changes me for the rest of my life.
     For the last couple of weeks I have been busy finishing up projects for school, running back and forth to the hospital to see my mom, and squeezing time in to play with my precious grandchildren.  This morning I took a few moments to sit in my beloved sanctuary, my deck, to drink a cup of coffee and start reading, The Noticer Returns.  As always, Andrews made me think.
     In the story there is a young homeless man with a chip on his shoulder.  With him is an older man that seems to resurface when the young man needs him the most.  The two are walking along a beach and take a short cut through a hotel.  The old man pushes the young man into the pool and the following conversation takes place,

     "Every single day for the rest of your life, somebody is going to push you in the pool.  And you'd better decide now how you're going to act when it happens."
     Jones squinted and leaned toward me.  "Are you gonna come out of the water whining?  Maybe crying or complaining?Will you come up mad and defiant, threatening everybody?  Will you throw your fists or worse?
     "Or will you come out of the water with a smile on your face?  Looking to see what you can learn...who you might help?  Will you act happy through you feel uncertain?"
     He stared at me for a beat or two before lowering his chin and speaking in an earnest tone.  "It's time to decide, son," he said.  "Almost every result that your life produces from this moment forward-good or bad-will depend upon how you choose.  Every day, in one form or another, whether you like it or not, you will be pushed in the pool.  You might as well decide right now how you'll act when it happens.

     I guess what struck me is that you can decide how you are going to react to challenges before they happen.  I can respond rather than react.  I have had many friends with special needs, as well as many parents of children with special needs, do this.  They have responded rather than reacted.  They haven't whined or complained, rather they have looked for something to learn and for someone to help.
     During the challenges I have faced in life, I have learned many things and I hope I have helped someone along the way.  However, planning a response to a challenge is something I never thought about.

Don't Miss Who They Are

I just read a quote from Dr. Temple Grandin that I love,

"There needs to be a lot more emphasis on what a child can do instead of what he cannot do."

Dr. Grandin is an amazing woman who happens to have autism.  Thankfully her incredible skills, gifts, and talents were developed and not overlooked.  I encourage you to watch the movie, Temple Grandin.  It will broaden your perspective and understanding of autism.

Bill and I have often been asked to meet with families that have been given the recent diagnosis of autism for one of their children.  Although there may be some things to be grieved over, there are also so many things to be celebrated.  With all of our children we need to be careful to not miss who they are because of who they aren't.  God has blessed me with many friends over the years with autism and they are loving, gifted and talented people.

Wheelchair Donation

One of my heroes is Joni Eareckson Tada.  Her organization, "Joni and Friends," has a ministry called "Wheels For the World" that I love and support.  Her organization collects wheelchairs from all over the United States, sends them to prisons to be refurbished, and then redistributes them to people in need all over the world.  The recipients are loved on, cared for, and fitted by a physical therapist to a wheelchair that is appropriate for them.  There is nothing like giving someone the gift of mobility!

I often have people ask me how to donate a wheelchair that is no longer being used.  Below is a link for "Wheels For the World."  Through their website you can find a location to donate an unused wheelchair.  My students and I raise money for "Wheels For The World" every year.  It is a worthy and trustworthy organization making a huge difference in people's lives, both physically and spiritually.

http://www.joniandfriends.org/blog/unused-wheelchair/

If you have a wheelchair to donate, please contact them.  They will appreciate your contribution!

Blessings-
Deana

You Are So Beautiful

I have watched this video several times.  I always marvel at how children have such a deep understanding and compassion without any walls.  It is amazing how compassionate dogs can be as well.  The little boy in the video has Down Syndrome but more importantly, he has a true friend.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sUgtd5TrUaY

I hope you are blessed by it...

Deana

Empowerment in Aging: Part II

On April my post was about "Empowerment In Aging."  Since then I have been thinking about suggestions for the senior years.  I hope at least one of these will sound fun!

1.  Organize your photos and write names and relationships on them because your children aren't                 going to know.
2.  Write or complete a book about your life.  There are many books available that you can just fill in the blanks or you can write your story in a journal.  Tell your family all those tidbits of information you have never shared before.
3.  Prepare a genealogy chart to pass on to your children and grandchildren.
4.  Send letters to people that have made a big difference in your life.  Remind them of what they did and tell them how it impacted your life.
5.  Make a board on Pinterest all about you and let your family know about it.
6.  Do something that was important to a loved one that has passed on.  Add to their legacy.
7.  Take a trip and visit a residence from your childhood.  Take pictures while you are there.
8.  Donate money to the high school you graduated from.  You could even specify it for a club or organization you were involved in.
9.  If you have walked a difficult journey in your life such as cancer,  visit with someone on that journey now.  Be sure to be encouraging!
10.  If there is a classic book you missed reading in your youth, purchase or borrow a copy and read it.  I am planning to read Great Expectations this summer.
11.  If you can, contact a former teacher and let them know how your life turned out.  Be sure to thank them for their part in it.
12.  Go to a restaurant and look for a youth that appears to be struggling.  Tell them how valued they are and buy their dinner.
13.  Buy a blank journal and write down the special possessions you have.  Write down who you want to have it and why.
14.  If you are a believer, write out your testimony and share it with family and friends.  If      appropriate, share it on Facebook too :)
15.  Visit a different church this Sunday.  God can be found in many places in a variety of ways.
16.  Write a "bucket list" and get started!
17.  Do something that makes you smile on a daily basis.  Plant a garden, for example.
18.  If you have extra time on your hands, visit a nearby elementary school and volunteer to help children that are learning to read.  Both of you will be blessed!
19.  If you hurt or wronged someone in your past, contact them, tell them how sorry you are and ask for forgiveness.
20.  Pick up a new hobby.  Surely there is something you have always wanted to learn how to do.
21.  Buy your favorite book as a child and then find a child to give it to.
22.  Go through your old pictures and then send them to someone else in the picture.  They will love the remembrance!
23.  Look back over your life and spend some time thanking God for all of the wonderful things He has done for you.
24.  Go to a park and find a young mom to encourage.  Remind her to enjoy whatever stage she is in with her children and then remind her of what is important.
25.  When you complete one of these, send me a comment and let me know how it went.  I love to hear other people's stories!

Everyone Needs Someone To Play With Them

     A close friend and occupational therapist sent me the article and link below.  The article is about a young man that is immobile and non-verbal.  The article shares about his desire to be paid attention to and better yet, gives suggestions on how to interact with him and build a relationship.  The suggestions are appropriate for so many people we love and care about.  I highly encourage you to read it and share it with a friend.   I hope you will find the article as helpful as I did.

http://www.preemiebabies101.com/2014/04/please-play-with-me/

Blessings-
Deana

Empowerment in Aging

     It doesn't seem like there is much time between getting your children through the teen/young adult years before your parents are going through the senior years.  The funny thing is, I don't know that they are all that different.

     During the teen years, you are trying to figure out who you are, where you belong in the world, what you have to offer the world and the interesting balance between freedom and responsibilities.  It seems to be the same in the senior years.  

     Yesterday I had lunch with a good friend who is in her seventies.  Just as I am re-evaluating my life in my fifties, she is in her seventies.  She shared that she is not ready to go yet.  I enthusiastically said, "That's great.  Now what are you going to do?"  She shared some of her project ideas and then she started sharing some of the difficult aspects of aging.  She feels that in your senior years the world tells you you aren't valuable anymore, you can't do this or that anymore, and you can't make responsible decisions.  The initial sassy part of me responds with, "What?  Who is saying that?  Blow it off."  Yet, there is another side of me...the practical side.

     As I age, I have to realize that there are tasks that will become more difficult for me.  I am not going to say that I can't do them anymore, I will just have to do them differently.  As with so many disabilities, you have to focus on changing how you can do something because you can't do it the same way any longer.  

     A good friend lost a leg from an accident.  He didn't have to stop skiing, he just had to do it differently.  A friend lost his ability to walk.  He still gets every where he wants to go, he just has to do it differently. Other friends have lost some of their memory.  It is not that they can't, they may just have to remember with the help of a piece of paper and a pencil.

     As we age we may find ourselves in the "special needs" category because we need support in ways we didn't before.  I am going out on a limb here, but we are the ones that can disable ourselves, however, by our response.  Are we going to focus on the "I can't" or the "Hmmm....how can I do it now?  What are my options?  What tools do I need?  What is the safest avenue for me to do this for me and the people around me?As we age, we need to empower ourselves with the understanding that we still can, we just have to do it differently.  We still have what the world needs, it just may be in a different form.  

     So...if you are aging, don't listen to the world, rather listen to yourself and to God.  I think we all have legacies we want to leave in this world and God has all the possibilities available to us.

Sanctuary: Do You Have One?

Splendor and majesty are before Him, strength and beauty are in His sanctuary.  Psalm 96:6

One thing I would love for all caregivers to have is a sanctuary. Sense almost everyone is caring for someone, I think we all should have a sanctuary.  A sanctuary is a place of refuge and a holy place.

     Over the years I have had a number of sanctuaries.  As a child I remember all of the beautiful sanctuaries I worshipped and learned about God in.  I especially loved the stained glass and wish it were in every church.  I remember the "sanctuary" of being served communion.  There is no greater remembrance of such a great sacrifice.

     I love the sanctuaries found in churches but there are also other sanctuaries that can be found in numerous places.  As a teen, during some difficult years, my sanctuary was found in a dear friend's garden while eating snow peas.  She taught me about God there and she loved me through my insecurities.  As a young adult my sanctuary was in Turkey Creek Canyon in Colorado.  I would drive up there regularly to spend some time with God.  Later in my twenties, I found God in the prayer garden of a sisterhood I stayed in.  That sanctuary was holy and peaceful and even though I wrestled with God for control, I knew He loved me...deeply.

     When we lived in the Houston area, it was a little harder to find my beloved sanctuary but I finally did on a bench overlooking Nassau Bay.  I especially loved the light house!  Since I have been in Texas I have looked for my sanctuary.  I often find "sanctuary" in a field of wildflowers. 

     About a year ago my sister-in-law made a sanctuary for herself and I loved it!  So I have been working on my own, right outside my back door.  I go there to rest, to read, to pray, and to enjoy beautiful flowers and birds.  It is becoming my place of refuge....my holy place.

More Than Conquerors...Dick and Rick Hoyt

I have always been amazed by Dick and Rick Hoyt, Boston Marathon stalwarts since 1981.  What makes them unique is Rick is a quadriplegic and his father pushes him throughout the race.  They have an amazing father and son bond.  They demonstrate incredible love and sacrifice for each other and the inspirational ability to overcome obstacles and challenges.  

I have attached a link to their story.  When you read their story it inspires you to conquer your own challenges and ultimately, not even see them as challenges.

http://wbur.fm/1ecVF6Z

Blessings-
Deana

WOW, kids! WOW!''

Yesterday was so incredible that I didn't even know how to write about it!  I was overwhelmed.  I was  incredibly happy!  And I am so grateful!  The compassion, the sacrifice, the insight, the drive, and the commitment of fifteen five-year-old children can be mind blowing.

Yesterday we gathered together to celebrate all that God had done through fifteen five-year-old children.  I shared with them the impact of what they had done over the last five weeks.  Because of the money they raised for wheelchairs, twenty people's lives would be different from now on.  They would be able to get out of their homes, be able to attend school, be able to play outside, would be able to attend church and would hear about the sacrificial love of Christ.

As Andy Andrews shares in his book, The Butterfly Effect, "everything you do matters."  Just as a butterfly flaps his wings and moves molecules of air and that in turn moves more molecules of air, these children have made a difference in people's lives and they in turn will make differences in more people's lives and the butterfly effect has occurred.  People from twelve different countries have heard about their journey and have been blessed by their story.

We were so grateful for Mary to join us from Joni and Friends.  She shared with the kids and gave them some beautiful books.  Mary listened to the stories of how the kids raised the money and then waited to hear, along with the kids, how much money had been raised.  

Our magician came in and magically pulled out ten butterflies from an empty box, representing ten wheelchairs.  A few minutes later she pulled out another ten butterflies, representing another ten wheelchairs.  The kids had raised $3,000 to help get refurbished wheelchairs to children and adults in other countries.  The kids had lemonade stands, sold cookies, snacks, and coffee.  The did a variety of chores.  They had concerts in the park.  They cleaned out gently used toys and clothes and sold them. They emptied their piggy banks.  They all used their own personal talents and abilities to raise the most money they could.  

We took a picture with our $3,000 check and then we threw hundreds of butterflies on a sheet and watched them fly.  I went to bed last night with the image of the kids with joy on their faces watching the butterflies fly into the air.  That image builds my faith and brings me great joy.

I hope you have enjoyed being with us on our journey and that it touches you.  Everyone around us has a need and a challenge and you may be the one that can meet it.  Watch the kids...they know exactly what to do when it comes to love.

I encourage you to learn more about Joni and Friends by visiting their website www.joniandfriends.org and by reading some of Andy Andrews books, The Boy Who Changed the World and The Butterfly Effect.  They will change your life.

Our journey is not over, it has actually just begun so I hope you don't go anywhere.  I would love to hear your stories and read your comments.  I encourage you to look for where God is working and join Him.  He will bless you more than you can imagine.

Day 22: Giving A Little More

Today I took some special pictures of the kids for our celebration next week and have been adding up the last bit of change.  Today what got me were the three bags of money and butterflies that came in.  One was from a little boy that brought in $20 from bringing in his neighbor's trash cans.  He has the sweetest, kindest face.  He was more than happy to do a little more.  The other two bags came from a little girl. She looked up at me with her beautiful eyes and smile and said, "I emptied my piggy banks."  It always stings my heart a little when they do that, but I am also blessed by the joy on their faces.  There is no end to their generosity and compassion.

Day 21: How Are We Different?

I am always a little sad when I come to the end of the unit on special needs that I teach my five-year-old class.  I pour my heart and soul into the unit.  I have added more experiences every year and yet I feel I have done such an inadequate job of giving everything I can to the kids.  There is so much I want to communicate to them.  All of the lessons I have learned so far took me 15 years to experience.  I don't know why I think I can teach them in four or five weeks.

Working with children and young adults with special needs has changed my perspective on all people and definitely helped me to understand myself in a different way.  You see we are all different but we are also all the same.  Everyone has a need to be loved, accepted, and valued.  It doesn't matter what our challenge or disability is.  We also have a need to be part of something bigger than ourselves.  When you know that someone needs to be valued and have purpose, you look at them differently.  You respond to them differently.

For so many years I struggled with self-image and through all of the friends I have made in this ministry I have realized that it doesn't matter.  If I struggle with self-image then I am focusing on myself, just as much as a person that struggles with arrogance does.  If I am going to communicate love and acceptance to others, then I have to believe it first for myself.  If I truly believe that we are ALL created in God's image, then that includes me as well.

Every year I hope and pray that my students leave my classroom believing and knowing they are loved, accepted, and valued.  I hope they can understand that God can show His power through any weakness they may have.  My hope is they will never spend their energy feeling self-conscious but will walk confidently knowing that they were made in God's image and God has a plan for them.

I know the things we have experienced over the last five weeks will fade from their memory but I hope the children are still changed.  I hope some of their questions have been answered and the walls so many of us have built will never be built in their lives.

This year marks 50 years of the signing of the Civil Rights Act and next year will mark 25 years of the Americans with Disabilities Act.  So much has changed in 50 years.  It is easy to focus on what has not happened that needs to, but our country and its attitudes are radically different than they were 50 years ago.  I hope my students will never know the injustices of the past and will be able to embrace people, their abilities and disabilities, in a way that is both empowering and honoring to the people God has created.