Grace Without Margins: Chapter Seventeen

Unexpected Tools

This is probably one of my favorite chapters because I love to talk about the incredible things God does.  In the book I share about a friend of ours that has a disability but looks for ways for God to be glorified through it.  I won't spoil the story if you haven't read the book but I do have some questions to consider...

• What do you think is your greatest weakness?
• Have you ever seen God use your weakness to do something amazing?
• If not, do you think God could ever use it in a powerful way?
• Do you believe that God can use your strengths and your weaknesses equally?
• What are some of the tools you have available to you in ministry?  Think of some ways you can help a child feel acceptance, feel loved, feel connected, and feel valuable in the church.

 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:10 (NIV)

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Sixteen

Advocate Vs. Influence

Can you recall a time when God set you up for something amazing?  He prompted you to do something.  You did it only out of obedience and then you watched God's plans unfold.

What is the hardest part for you in trusting God's promptings?  Do you second guess if you heard Him right?  Is it hard to take the next step?  Is it hard to not be the one in control?

What images and situations come to mind when you think about the word "advocate?"  When have you seen advocacy used effectively?  When have you seen it do more harm than good?

What images and situations come to mind when you think about the word "influence?"  When have you seen influence used effectively?  When has it not been effective?

In your current ministry, in what areas do you need to advocate and in what areas do you need to influence?  Who is the best advocate on your ministry team?  Who is the best influencer?  What do you need to learn from each other?

I found a quote yesterday that I love.  

What I like in a good author is not what he says, but what he whispers. 

~Logan Pearsall Smith, 

"All Trivia," Afterthoughts, 1931

I remember one Sunday I heard a children's ministry volunteer talking to another volunteer about the "normal" children.    I leaned over and whispered, "Have you thought about what that word communicates about the other kids?"  That is all I needed to whisper.  This particular volunteer is an amazing lady and I share it with humility because I had someone whisper in my ear years ago.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Fifteen

Recognizing Similarities

As people we tend to think we are alone in our trials and sufferings.  Sometimes we think we have it harder than anyone else.  The truth is, we all suffer.  Everyone of us will go through something difficult that we don't think we will ever be able to survive.  I have met very few people that have not experienced deep sorrow and disappointment, and, if I think they haven't, they probably haven't shared the deep wounds of their heart, or they haven't had their turn yet.

• Think of a time with the unexpected happened.  How did your react?  I love Andy Andrews book, The Noticer Returns.  In the book a young man is pushed into a very cold pool and the wise man that pushed the young man in says, "Every single day for the rest of your life, somebody is going to push you in the pool.  And you’d better decide now how you’re going to act when it happens.”
• Think about a time when your life changed course?
• What are some of the challenges you think a family affected by disability experiences?
• How about reaching out to a family in your church and asking them about their journey.  You will be amazed and you will be blessed to hear their story.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Fourteen

Let's Be Honest

Christ did not choose whom to love.  He simply loved.  

7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

1 John 4:7-8 (NIV)

• Who is hard for you to love?
• Where are your blind spots?
• What type of person do you make assumptions about?
• In what relationships do you need to grow and change?
• How can your ministry partners hold you accountable?

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Thirteen

Sharing the Gospel

Sometimes we loose sight of what matters the most in ministry.  We can become so focused on the logistics of ministry that we forget the ultimate purpose and that is to introduce people to the love, grace and salvation of Christ's ultimate sacrifice.

• Do you have someone on your ministry team that is passionate about sharing the gospel to a variety of children with a variety of backgrounds and abilities?
• Do you properly value this aspect of the ministry?
• Are you providing him/her the resources needed?  
• Do you provide training and growth opportunities?
• Do you have a team of people committed to praying for evangelism opportunities?

It can be tempting to doubt you are making a difference in the lives of children that are non-verbal.  You may never know the outcome of your efforts until you get to heaven.  That is ok!  Trust God, trust the Holy Spirit, pray and be full of joy and anticipation.  One of the most amazing things about God is, you never know what He is up to.  We can trust, however, that He is always working in the hearts of the people we minister to as well as ourselves.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Twelve

Wookie Wookie

It has been a blessing to me over the years to find a special greeting for the kids that it takes a little more time to build a relationship with.  Think of a greeting that compliments the child.  For example, I worked with one little girl that could not communicate orally and rarely showed expression on her face.  It was important to be consistent and to greet her the same way the moment I saw her.  With her, I always signed "beautiful girl."  I can't say she ever smiled when I greeted her but she always looked for my sign and then would come towards me and hug me.  She will always be my "beautiful girl."

Turn towards your ministry partner, hold up your hands, make them "talk" and say, "Wookie Wookie."  Do this over and over.  It was kind of fun, wasn't it!

Here are some ideas on developing a special greeting:

• Give them a "sign name."
• Give a "high five."
• Give a "fist bump."
• Give them a compliment. 
• Greet them with the same phrase.

In your discussion group, share ways you have done this.  What greeting have you continually used without realizing it?

Give an example of a time when you entered someone else's world.  What was the outcome?

Share about a child you are wanting to reach.  Let the group give you some ideas on how to greet them or enter their world.

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Eleven

Listening With Your Heart

"The ability to listen with your heart can come naturally, but it can also develop over time.  I think this is one of the many reasons God asks us to serve one another.  It gives us time, in the presence of another, to learn when they need and what they are going to be able to impart to us.  Listen with your heart."

Relationships are not easy.  Even the ones we think are easy have their difficult moments.  I wish I had heard the phrase "listen with your heart" many years ago.  There are so many relationships and moments within those relationships when I wish I had stopped, taken a step back and listened with my heart.  If I had set aside my own desires...if I had listened to the wisdom of someone else...if I had just comforted instead of tried to "fix" something...if I had listened for the real concern rather than the one I assumed it was... things may have turned out differently.

Listen with your heart when you have a conflict

• with your parents
• with your friends
• with your boss 
• with your spouse
• with your children
• with the child in your Sunday School class
• with the family walking through the doors of your church
• and especially, with God

My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. John 10:27

Special Needs Training Opportunity

Whether you are a church blessed with a few people or a number of people affected by special needs or a parent or volunteer looking for support in starting a special needs ministry, we would love to have you join us for our training sessions.

Special Needs Ministry Training Part I:  Austin, Texas
Hill Country Bible Church Lakeline Campus Bldg A Room 2.120
Saturday, January 10, 2014

8:30 am - 2:00 p.m.

"How to Start a Special Needs Ministry":  Attend a one-hour training that will help you think outside the box on what this ministry can look like.  We will discuss vision and purpose as well as discuss ideas on how to get your church leadership and congregation on board, changing a culture and recruiting, training and motivating volunteers.  We will also discuss some of the obstacles and blessings you will encounter in this ministry.

B.U.D.D.Y. I:  Join us for a three-hour B.U.D.D.Y. training.  This training focuses on the nuts and bolts of working with a variety of disabilities and age groups.  During this portion of the training we will discuss behavior modification strategies, handling seizures, general safety and security issues, as well as many other topics.

The cost is $25 per person and will include snacks and lunch. Please RSVP or contact us, Bill and Deana Boggess, at theboggi@aim.com.  You can also reach us at 512-673-0187.  We look forward to hearing from you!

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Ten

Shun, Enable or Empower

Have you ever thought about what these words mean?  Our perspective on these three words will affect how we interact with people in our ministries and our personal lives.

• Have you ever been shunned?  Have you ever shunned someone else?  How did it make you feel?
• Have you ever been enabled?  Have you ever enabled someone else?  How did it make you feel?
• Have you ever been empowered?  Have you ever helped empower someone else?  How did it make you feel?
• How do you feel about comforting, stabilizing and then empowering families affected by disabilities?  What would it mean for your church to do this?  What changes would you need to make?

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Nine

Fear Vs. Pity

Here are some interesting questions to discuss for chapter nine...

• Have you ever been afraid of someone with a disability?  Why did they scare you?  What changed?
• Have you ever been grown close enough to someone that you no longer saw their disability?
• Have you ever experienced a time when your greatest strength became your greatest weakness?  Explain.
• Have you ever experienced a time when your greatest weakness became your greatest strength?  Explain.
• Have you ever pitied someone?  Why?
• Has anyone ever pitied you?  How did it make you feel?
• Have you ever disabled someone with your mercy?

Save The Date...

Save the Date!

Our next special needs ministry training will be held on January 10th in Cedar Park at 

Hill Country Bible Church. 

More details will follow soon but I wanted to at least get the date to you!

Grace Without Margins: Chapter Eight

Fairness

"Fairness is not about giving people the same thing, it is about giving people what they need."

"How Difficult Can This Be?" Richard Lavoie

• Do you expect all of the children in your ministry to worship the same way?
• Does it make you uncomfortable if they worship differently than the rest of the kids?  Why?
• Whose weakness needs to be looked at?  The person with special needs or yours?
• Who are you missing out on because they are different from you?
• What have you let a five-year-old teach you lately?