Monday, April 24, 2017

Are You Listening?

Many times in my adult life I have had people tell me that I am a really good listener.  At times I have been and I am certainly a better listener in my 50's than I was in my 20's.

I have many regrets in my life when it comes to listening.  There are times I should have been more attentive to my husband telling me how his day was.  I should have listened more to my children as they were going through the teen years instead of worrying about being the perfect parent and keeping my attention there.  I should have been a better listener when I met new people, especially people that have lived a different life than I have.

A few years ago I started thinking about how to be a better listener and it has changed my life and my perspective on people.  I want to consider myself inclusive, but I am constantly reminded of the walls I still build up.  So I challenge myself periodically.  I challenge myself to find someone I don't understand and just sit down and listen to their journey.

Over the last few years I have been blessed by the company of a variety of people and the more I listened to their story, the more I see what we have in common.  The more I listened to their heart, the more my heart changed.

Over the last few years:

  • I have visited with a young man affected by schizophrenia and bi-polar disorder. 
  • I have played with a child with autism.
  • I have asked a concentration camp survivor to share her story with me.
  • I have spent an afternoon with a young man living with a traumatic brain injury.
  • I have had a lovely conversation with someone that speaks a different language than I do.
  • I have listened to the perspectives of a democrat.
  • I have listened to the perspectives of a republican.
  • I have asked for advice from a child.
  • I have asked someone that uses a wheelchair what are the most hurtful things people do as they interact with him.
  • I have bought a meal for a stranger and asked them to tell me their story.
When we listen to others, the barriers are erased.  When we listen to someone else's story, they become a real person with real hurts and feelings.  When we listen, we change ourselves.

Who are you going to listen to this week?


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