Grace Without Margins: Chapter One

Setting the Stage

The stage is set by the experiences of our past.  Our perspectives and opinions are shaped by
them.  This week share with a friend or ministry worker about your upbringing and the
experiences that had an impact on your future.

• Have you ever felt like a minority?  Describe the experience.
• Has racial inequality been a struggle in your lifetime?
• Who was the rock in your family while you were growing up?
• What did your mom and dad's life show you?
• Describe the types of people that frequented your home as you were growing up.  Who frequents your home now?
• Do you count the cost of doing what is right?  Explain.
• Talk about a time when you had to trust God.

Grace Without Margins: The Introduction

     One of my favorite verses in the Bible is,

"Where there is no vision, the people perish." Proverbs 29:18 (NIV)

I love that God continually gives me vision.  It would be incredibly challenging to me if I were to ever find myself without one.  I feel fully alive when I can see God's vision before me.  It helps me get up in the morning and feel wonderfully exhausted when I go to bed at night.  Has God given you a vision for your life?  Have you looked for it?

     These are only two of the questions I have for the Introduction to my book, Grace Without Margins.  Below are more questions to think about and discuss with a friend or partner in ministry.

• Have you ever listened to the I Have A Dream speech by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.?  What statement did Dr. King make that stood out to you the most?
• What legacy has been handed down to you?
• What are the hopes you have for your children?
• How have your children challenged you to grow?
• Who have been your "spotters" in your journey?
• Where has Jesus taken you that made you hold His hand tightly?

A Virtual Small Group

     It was 6:30 am on a Saturday morning and yep, God woke me up early.  I was so looking forward to sleeping in but God had other plans and I must say, I am glad.  Earlier this week a friend of a friend asked if I would put together discussion questions for my book, Grace Without Margins.  My sweet Lord prompted me to get up and get started.

     I love all of my friends on Facebook, that is why you are on there.  If I could I would have you all over for coffee and listen to you share about your lives...that would be great fun!  Not all of us like to sit around with a cup of coffee talking about our pasts and dreaming about the future, however.  I would never want to overwhelm you with post after post on Facebook.  So....

     For the next 24 weeks I am going to share, I hope, thought provoking questions with you.  Maybe God will lead you to discuss them with a friend or they can be ice-breaker questions at your next children's ministry meeting or congregational care gathering.  I will not put them on Facebook but you can receive notifications of posts by becoming a member of my blog.  I don't want to overwhelm my friends on Facebook that are not interested. You can sign up to receive notifications of posts on my homepage.

     Thank you for visiting with me.  If you have insights or past experiences that would encourage the rest of us, I would love for you to share them with us in the comments section.  I suppose we could have a virtual small group of sorts.  In no way am I an expert, merely a facilitator that loves to encourage dialog.

     I hope you have a great week and I will see you starting Monday, October 27th.  Be sure to sign up if you want to be a member :)

Ministry Growing Pains

     When Bill and I first started the special needs ministry at our church the people we served were very young.  They were pre-school age or not even born yet.  Even though we were very inexperienced, it was relatively easy because the children were so young.

     Now the children are in their teens and young twenties and that has greatly changed the dynamics of the ministry.  There are different needs physically, socially, emotionally and spiritually when 16 years have passed.  The growing pains can be incredibly difficult but they can also be very exciting.  When ministry is going smoothly we tend to take the ministry for granted.  We turn to God less and so often hold onto the ministry too tightly and don't seek the Lord's direction.  When you are in the midst of growing pains, however, you have to turn your focus back on God and look for His guidance.  Then God came reveal His plans for the future.

     Many years ago my father said, "You will know your ministry is successful when you can no longer see it.  It should be in the very fabric of your church."  Unfortunately I didn't have enough time left with my dad to fully understand what that would mean.  Bill and I have had to learn on our own and I am still wrestling with that question.  Dad talked about the physical aspects of our building and how the facility was in compliance with disability accessibility, but the harder part would be in relationships.  How do you help the church grow in such a way that a person with a disability can walk through the doors of the church and feel welcomed and assimilated into the church family no matter what avenue they used to come in?  In other words, they need to feel comfortable in the church as a whole, not just in the special needs ministry.  

     How do we help the wheelchairs, glasses, hearing aids, and other aids disappear so we can see the person?  Then later add them back in as just another dimension of that person?  How do we help the totality of a church body not be afraid, but simply embrace the people God brings to them?

     I still don't have the answers, but I keep mulling something over.  When we started the ministry we named it and gave it an identity.  It was put under children's ministry because we were serving children.  I wonder if the the best thing to do now would be to start at the top and work our way down.  We have a valuable asset in our church and that is the elderly.  They often have physical challenges.  They are experiencing a great deal of transition and may feel they don't have a place in the church anymore.  What if we invest some time in gleaning from their wisdom?  Ask questions about how they feel connected or disconnected in the church.  Make sure they understand their value and help them find a place to serve if they aren't already.  They may need some accommodations to be able to serve, but we can learn so much from them.  If we get in the habit of making sure our family members feel welcome, nurtured and assimilated into the church family, the very fabric of our church can change and grow.  Do we believe that everyone is created in God's image?  Do we believe that everyone has been given gifts and can serve in the church?  If the answer to those questions is yes, then find a way for everyone to serve and grow and feel welcome.  You may have to make some mistakes, but the investment will be worth it.  

     The music world would be different without the talent of Stevie Wonder.  Our history would have been different without the inspiration of Helen Keller.  Your church will be different without the young lady with Down Syndrome that is impacting your church...one hug at a time.

     God always has an amazing plan.  I cannot wait to see what God is going to do next.  In the meantime, I will look for His footprints in ministry and in the lives of the people He brings through the church doors.  

Grace Without Margins

     When I look back over my life it is fascinating to see the things God did to prepare me for the experiences that would happen in the future.  I never would have predicted those experiences but when I need a little wisdom or insight into a situation, if I sit back and think about it, I will be able to recall numerous experiences that will show me how God prepared me.  One of the greatest blessings of my life has been serving a community of people affected by special needs, yet God taught me so many things before I even got there.
     When my father passed away twelve years ago, I promised God I would do whatever He asked of me.  Then the words and stories of this book came to me and I would get up in the middle of the night and write them down.  My commitment to doing whatever God asked of me wasn't so much in writing the book, but in publishing it.  It is quite scary to put your heart on paper and then let the whole world read it.
     A journey through special needs, civil rights, and above all, grace. "My hope is that, through sharing my heart with you, you will be moved. Maybe there is a child that will come through the door of your church this week and you will look at them differently. Hopefully, you will not look at them with the fears of starting a new ministry, but with a heart of compassion that simply wants to embrace them and all that God has made them to be. I promise you the journey will be amazing and you will be both changed and blessed!"
     Even if we do not have a church title by our name, we all have a ministry.  It is a ministry that we serve in every day with every person that comes across our path.

Every day of your life is an opportunity to be a blessing to someone.  Author Unknown

http://www.amazon.com/Grace-Without-Margins-Deana-Boggess-ebook/dp/B00O384IOO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1413339700&sr=8-1&keywords=grace+without+margins

Embrace The Challenge!

     The other day I wrote about a word that I don't like:  confinement.  Today I wanted to talk about a word that I do like:  embrace.  Embrace, according to Dictionary.com, means the following:

1.  to take or clasp in the arms; press to the bosom; hug.

2.  to take or receive gladly or eagerly; accept willingly:

     to embrace an idea.

3.  to avail oneself of:

     to embrace an opportunity.

4.  to adopt (a profession, a religion, etc.)

5.  to take in with the eye or the mind.

6.  to encircle; surround; enclose.

7.  to include or contain

     I think it is interesting our society embraces glasses.  They represent a challenge for us.  They show that we are less than perfect but as a society we tend to think of them as a fashion statement.  A couple of years ago I had to get glasses, progressive lenses no less, and I bought glasses with leopard print on them.  That isn't exactly inconspicuous!

     Since my husband is an audiologist I asked him why hearing aids are not thought of the same way.  He chuckled and said there was a time a few years ago that manufacturers were trying to make them a fashion statement by adding jewelry.  I said, "It was a flop, wasn't it?"  Once again, he laughed.

     Over the years I have met many people that refuse to wear hearing aids because they don't want anyone to see them or think less of them.  I guess I want to say, take it and clasp it in your arms,

embrace the opportunity, receive it gladly, adopt and adapt, encircle it, and include it in your life.  

     I remember so many dinner conversations with my dad checked out because he couldn't hear anyone very well.  He was left out.  I have numerous other friends that have done the same thing.

     A few years ago I wore a hearing aid so I could understand one of my students.  I didn't wear them for a few years after that and now, well, I think they may be a permanent part of my getting ready in the morning.  I realized that I was missing out.  I was frustrating some loved ones when they had to constantly repeat things for me.  On top of it you can only act like you understood a conversation and give inappropriate responses so long before you look like you have other challenges as well.

     I am still getting used to some of the sounds I never heard like rustling paper and water dripping.  I am also discovering that not near as many people have speech impediments as I once thought :) but I feel more included, especially in crowds and at restaurants.

     I just want to encourage you to get your hearing checked if you are feeling more left out of conversations.  Your family wants you fully present and able to add to conversation.  Life is going to throw all kinds of challenges at us.  We can't always dodge them.  Sometimes we just have to embrace them.  So even if you have to add a little "bling," make a fashion statement if needed!

The Blessing of Down Syndrome

My heart is coming out on paper soon in a book called, Grace Without Margins.  In the book I refer to a young man as having the blessing of Down Syndrome.  Before I sent it back to the publisher for printing I asked a friend of mine, who has a daughter with Down Syndrome, if anyone would be bothered by my use of the word, "blessing."  I asked if people would understand.  She said it was fine and in fact, she had said it in her post earlier that day.

The friends of mine with Down Syndrome are amazing people.  One of them is a great swimmer, one is the friendliest and hardest working employee at HEB, and one is a virtual friend who is changing the world, one hug at a time!

I have attached a video that beautifully displays the "True Colors" of a person and the love we need to extend to one another.  The blessing of Down Syndrome is the ability to love, to hug, to come to God as a child, and the ability to show one's true colors with openness and honesty.

Cyndi Lauper - True Colors (MattyBRaps Cover ft Olivia Kay)


Blessings-
Deana

Take Off the Turtleneck

I guess we all have our issues and one of mine is confinement.  I never liked turtlenecks because they confined my neck.  I have never liked closed-toed shoes, because well, they confined my toes.  I love to hug, but I also have a somewhat larger space bubble.  I don't like small rooms, small cars, or small clothes....there you go.

Most of all, however, I don't like boxes or at least not being confined to one.  I have never liked boxes.  I don’t like to teach in a box and I definitely don’t like to put children in a box.  They don’t need labels from me such as class clown or brain or the colorful one.  I should never limit a child’s potential by a box I picked for them.

As an adult I don't like to be called a republican.  I don't like to be called a democrat.  I don't like to be called conservative or liberal because I am either one or both depending on who is confining me.

My point is, we shouldn't feel the necessity to confine people with a box or a label.  We are all wonderfully complex with the ability to learn and grow and even change.  I have several friends with recent diagnoses.  I would hate for them to be put in a box with a diagnosis label because you know what, they are still everything they were before.  They have just added another dimension.

This week remember to embrace the totality of a person.  Describe them by their gifts, their talents and their impact.  Let them be free to be all that God designed them to be.